I am a teacher.
I am a teacher of 382 Kindergarten through 6th grade students for 180 days of each year.
Every day I try my best with my kids.
Everyday I kindly greet them at the door.
Everyday I try to keep the expectations the same.
Everyday I try to create a fun and energetic atmosphere, to not only convince them that music is fun, but to convince them that they love music.
I try to keep my lessons organized.
I try to manage each student in a firm but loving way.
I try to use positive language to correct behavior.
I try to pull them in with enthusiasm.
I try to make them laugh.
I try and make them feel great about everything musical they produce
........... And I try to keep it cool when one, or all of these things don't work out.
I try all these things for 180 days of each year. Sometimes I fail and thank the good Lord above that no one was there to witness the tragedy, and sometimes I succeed to the point that I wish an administrator or colleague was there to watch.....just to prove that "See? I AM good at this!"
These are all the things that every teacher deals with on a daily basis. It soon becomes very obvious why teachers think and talk a lot about teaching. Let's face it. We try so hard and care so much about how our behavior/skill effects our kids, that it becomes personal and.....dare I say it.......emotional. I don't care how good you are at 'not taking your work home' with you. This is a fact, to some degree, with every educator in the world.
Unfortunately, this 'emotional attachment' results in a lot of competition.......especially in the music education world........and it is this innate competition that has had me doing a lot of thinking lately.
In the music education world ones 'success' tends to be all about what place your marching band got, about how your group did at festival, about how many of your kids were accepted to All-State, about if your group was asked to play at Conference, or just simply how many kids are willingly a part of your program.
The listed things above are literally topics of conversation at every music teacher gathering, no matter how big or small. Now let me be clear....I am not ignorant to the fact that all of these things are absolutely something to be proud of and excited about. I also realize that if one or all of these things are happening, the credited teacher is doing something right. Clearly their teaching results in these successes. I am worried however, that the basic importance of teaching is often pushed aside, or rather.....not emphasized enough. Please let me explain:
This is my fourth year of teaching, and while I feel much more confident about my skills, I know that I still have a long way to go. In my present position at Spanaway Elementary, (to the best of my knowledge) I filled a position that has had a series of mediocre music teachers for the past.... let's say.....few years. Selfishly, this was a great position to fill. As a result, everything I have done is 100x better than most of what they had before.....by default alone. After my first few months alone, I could confidently say that my kids liked me and even enjoyed coming to music- which rumor has it......was not the case before. I even had/have a historically large enrollment in my choir. Maybe it was because they felt that I cared about them and loved teaching.....but most likely was because I made my lessons fun and age appropriate. Either way, I should be proud of what I've done. While my accomplishments haven't looked fancy on paper, I would venture to say it has been the best 'musical experience' these kids have ever had.
And still... even after all this, I have recently felt terrible about my successes as a teacher. The competition that is integrated into the music education culture has left me feeling sub par, left me feeling...... less than adequate. Keep in mind that I've just explained how hard I try, how I give everything I know.....and still the culture of music education leaves me feeling not good enough.
One particular general music teacher comes to mind who is simply amazing. In our music meetings she shares techniques, ideas, excitement and the loads of success stories that come along with it. Since we have similar teaching styles, I really do love to hear what she has to say and I love gleaning new ideas from her. But I also find myself sad about the fact that I'm not getting the same results or upset that I was excited about what I was doing but it's clearly not as good as what's going on in her (or his...or whoevers...) program.
Now before you get all worried about my emotional health or state of mind, I do realize that these feelings or thoughts are fairly healthy......especially for such an emotional career. (yes. admit it, all you 'infallible' band teachers out there. This is fact.) Because we all know that if your thinking of these things, it means you're trying to learn how to become better. But, let's not forget that I really am trying my best everyday....... So the question still stands.....
How do I try so hard and not get results like that? How come they have such a clearer picture of how to teach this technique or grade level? How come my choir doesn't sound like that? .......Essentially we ask ourselves.........How do they do that????
Maybe it's innate. Maybe they spend every weekend in their classrooms planning. Maybe they spend every weekend at a clinic or workshop. Maybe they have higher expectations. Maybe their student 'clientele' is easier to work with. Maybe they spend every evening at school dealing with various performances that their groups have been committed to. Maybe they don't have a life outside of school.........or maybe, it just comes naturally. Either way, they're teachers, who for some reason get results. But in the end, am I any less of a teacher than the folks who kids are sent to all-state and whose bands win every competition? I would like to think not. and it angers me that people (including me) would even consider such a question.
In the end It should all come down to what the kids feel and more importantly........ how you make them feel. Do the kids love seeing you every day? Do the kids go out of their way to have a conversation with you? Do the kids respect what you teach in rehearsal? Do the kids still search for your approval even when everything went wrong in rehearsal? While I know that 'numbers' in your program and 'festival wins' sometimes reflect all these positive and wonderful attributes.....I think people forget that often times these things can happen even when your successes aren't obvious to the public.
So I propose a big fat 'cheers' to all the good teachers out there that don't get all the public recognition they deserve. Cheers to all the teachers out there who get kids to love music regardless.
And cheers to all the teachers who work their butts off everyday for the sheer benefit of kids.
Cheers to all you 'unknown' teachers out there.......
You've done good.
